Wednesday, May 08, 2013

This Holiday Season

Nothing says "I care" more than a Holiday card that literally says "I care" when you open it, spoken in clear plain English. Too bad that technology is at least 2 years away. Until that glorious day when we teach paper to talk, we'll just have to settle on using Hallmark cards; in all their neo-abstract-impressionist pretentiousness. 

Also I want a talking rug, that says "ouch"! when I step on him, and a sassy talking light bulb, "How many of YOU does it take to screw ME in?" He'll entreat.

But I digress. This Holiday season try to remember what really matters: the difference between what you spent on gifts and what you think the gifts you received are worth. 

Here's hoping for a net positive. 

- Santa Clause